Thankfully, I don’t suffer from depression. But a few people close to me do. And I’m sure a few people you know do as well, but maybe they’ve never told you.
With the passing of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain from suicide and suspected depression, it’s just something I feel very pulled to talk about for a moment.
Kate Spade hit home because even though she hasn’t been with the brand for a long time, the company she founded has had a huge impact on my career. ksny has been a supportive partner for years. And while I never knew or met her, it makes me sad to hear of her passing and of the pain and sadness she felt.
While I was at my workout class this morning I was chatting with a friend and we were talking about the Stanley Cup (just won by the Washington Capitals) and the news in general and I was saying how I don’t watch the news, and she said so you probably didn’t hear about Anthony Bourdain. And my jaw just hit the floor. No I hadn’t heard about Anthony Bourdain.
During the class I was focused on the pain my body was in but when I got into my car I just burst out into tears. The depths of sadness someone must be in to take their own life just guts me. As someone who’s never had depression, I can’t say I have any idea what it feels like. I can’t relate, I don’t know what it feels like, and I’d never try to say that my seasonal blues (me having a bad attitude in the winter because I’m sick of cold weather) even compare. Nothing I’ve ever felt has been even close to depression. But I do my best to be empathetic to anyone who suffers from it.
The point of writing about it today is so that if just one person reads it and feels better, or chooses to get help, or goes and gets on medicine that can help, or decides to talk to a therapist — or just talk to ANYONE about what they are going through, then it’s worth it.
Depression is not your fault. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. I know it’s something you can’t just snap out of. It is real. And no one deserves to have it, or feel that type of sadness. And you don’t have to. There are ways to get help. And I know that’s the hardest part — getting help, talking about it, maybe even realizing that you have it.
But it’s not your fault, there are many reasons people have it, and sometimes it’s literally a chemical in your brain. If you feel extreme sadness and are thinking of suicide, please please please talk to someone and get help. If you don’t want to reach out to someone you know, you can always call 1-800-273-8255 or get online here.
Now, for those of you who don’t have depression, but think maybe someone in your life does, obviously reach out to them. Connect with them, see how they are doing. There are a few things to look for if you think someone might be depressed — if they don’t want to do things or don’t enjoy things they used to enjoy doing. If the glass is always half empty, even the best day is not a good day to them. If they wake up every day sad or if nothing bad has happened that day but they are sad and feel like it’s a bad day. You can read more about it here, but go out of your way to be kind and reach out to your friends and family today. Especially those you feel might be sad or have depression.
Life is never perfect, even for people who seem to have it all. There will always be ups and downs and good times and bad times. But even so, you can be happy, or happy at least some of the time. You don’t deserve to feel depressed or continued sadness. I might not have the most perfect life, of the life I pictured, but I’m happy — and everyone deserves to feel happy.